The Dinner Dilemma
A logic puzzle for only the most advanced
You remember how to do logic puzzles from elementary school, right? Make yourself a little chart, add in some Xs and dots (or checks, as you may prefer) as you go through the clues and eliminate possible answer combinations. Well, get your pencils ready, because this one’s a doozy!
Puzzle:
Eating a nutritious dinner together as a family is the most important thing you can do for your child, EXCEPT for making sure they get enough sleep. Sleep is crucial to brain development, growth, a strong immune system, and all kinds of other things. But let’s not get distracted here. Back to dinner— read the clues below to solve the puzzle and determine what you should make for dinner (and don’t forget that dinner is necessary every single night unless you want a revolt on your hands, so you get to repeat this puzzle endlessly).
Wild Cards Clues:
Dinner should preferably be home-cooked, completely from scratch if possible (processed foods aren’t good for you, you know!), and something that your family likes, or will at least tolerate without too much complaining.
You need to feed three kids and two adults each night. There are fewer than five meals that all three children like, but they ARE in agreement that they don’t love the crockpot (which is, hands down, your favorite way to cook).1
As a middle-aged mom, YOU need to be getting significant amounts of protein (a struggle for someone who would be content subsisting on sparkling water and sugar), so be sure to factor that into your meal planning.2
Groceries are a million dollars now, and healthy food is significantly more expensive than junk food, so good luck with staying on budget.
Kid one has swim practice that falls in the hours of 5-7:15, depending on the day. Kid one also has to wake up before 6 am for school and has been complaining about not getting enough sleep. Swim practice is every evening, Monday through Friday.3
Dinner options for the gold standard of eating together: 4 pm or 8 pm.
Except! Kid two and kid three aren’t home from school by 4 pm (and you are also not home because you have to pick them up).
This leaves 8 pm. But 8 pm dinner leads to chaotic, too-late bedtimes because everyone is D-O-N-E done by then, including yourself, and you can’t get it together to get everyone to bed quickly and efficiently. Plus, sleep. Everyone needs more sleep.
Kid one, who has to get up early and is vocal about getting more sleep, doesn’t WANT to eat dinner at 4 pm! He’s only twelve, not a senior citizen! Have you lost your mind telling him he should eat dinner at 4 o’clock?!
But the sleep! Everyone needs sleep, so you are going to try this 4 pm thing.
Except that means you have to eat dinner in two shifts (not together—hopefully all the years you DID eat together will count for something!). So you have to cook something that can be ready at 4 pm but also at 6 pm, that everyone will like, and is nutritious, and the kids would really prefer if it didn’t come from the crockpot, but have they looked at this logic puzzle? They have not, so they can eat whatever you can come up with! Which is…4
Forget the logic puzzle. Who has dinner ideas for me?
My kids may not appreciate Irving Nachumsohn, inventor of the crock pot, but I sure do!
Taking all of your suggestions for protein-heavy meals and snacks (except for beef sticks—my kids love them, I cannot bring myself to even try them).
I know this is insane—and I didn’t even mention Saturday morning practices, because those don’t interfere with dinner! I always said I was not going to be a club or travel sports parent, but somehow, here we are.
So far, we have successfully made it through two days of this crazy dinner schedule, so I have exactly two meal ideas that work (taking it day by day and living on the edge here). If you also have a crazy dinner schedule and need ideas, the two successful meals so far have been Hawaiian chicken sandwiches (chicken breasts + bbq sauce + crushed pineapple in the crockpot, Hawaiian rolls for the sandwich bread) and meatball subs (frozen meatballs + sauce in the crockpot, sub rolls + provolone cheese).
Ooof Laura, I relate so much to trying to cater to everyone’s tastes and needs. I can only imagine what it will be like when we throw crazy schedules into the mix! Here’s what comes to mind for meals: soups that can sit on the stove and be ladled out whenever, chili, build your own baked potato bar, Mexican food that can be assembled in multiple different ways/at different times (make one meat and let everyone decide to do tacos/bowls/nachos/etc), one night a week of of your on your own meals. Loving reading all of these responses!
Oh my gosh. This is the hardest math/logic/LIFE problem ever but this essay is hilarious and so needed. Thank you, Laura! I'm so glad for the laugh and I'm so glad to know I'm not alone in this insanity of making meals.
And also, I have no meal ideas except chicken nuggets. Sometimes I buy them at Trader Joe's to make me feel better because I think I'm giving my kids a healthy option.